Ou 'Golf Day' often receives a mixed reaction. With handicaps varying from 1 to infinity and the Isles of Scilly links proving long and treacherous, some Hoot Toots decline the invitation to walk the course. But those that do dress well and enjoy a great day out, with some interesting match play.
Hoot Toots Golf - Winning Teams
Pre-2000 - no golf. 2000 - Eadless, Griff Griff Griffiths and Maurice (Stu Moffat) 2001 - Golf played but details not recorded. 2002 - 2 rounds of 9 holes played with different teams - no winners. 2003, 2004 - No golf 2005 - Golf played but details not recorded 2006, 2007 - No golf 2008 - (Social visit only) 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014 - No competition 2015 - Hutch, Moff, Beers (Everyone gets soaked on the back 9) 2016 - TBW, Tucks, Gribs (off the ladies' tees) 2017 - Cookie, Colin, Stuart, KP - (By 2 shots. KP retires after 9) 2018 - Child Snr, Child Jnr, Beers, Reggats (By 3 shots) 2019 - Stuart, Jake, Gribbs, Grant 2020 - Cookie, Tomsy, Tango (win by 2 shots) [Not for the first time a team comprising Hutch and Tucks come last in the competition] 2021 - Stu, Jake, Gribbs Grant (Score 72, Win by 2 shots) 2022 - Captain Tom Child, Hutch, Shep and Remo (Score 74) 2023 - Pente Jnr, Remo, Hutch, Puckers (Score 68. Win by 1 shot)
* = details a little fuddled.
"Blade on the 1st tee. Goodness me, hear the roar from the crowd as he hits the ball. He's found the centre of the fairway, but the ball appears to be lost either in a rabbit hole or a tuft of thick heather."
Hoot Toots Hall of Infamy
'Short Iron' Child.
Bubba Hutchings.
Ging Seng Shepherd.
Mumbai Moorus III
Moffat Van Mole
Bubbles Watson.
Pente McDivot Jnr.
Thomas Stenson Karlsson.
The Slicing Blade.
Chit Shott.
Griff Griff Griff Griff Griff Griffiths,
Chef Mickelson.
Yips Gardner.
Zhang Chang Bang Hobbs.
'Feck Aaff' Barnecut,
Remo Gibb.
Grant Handshaker III.
Gribsta - Who Els?
"The Gribster on 10 putting for an eagle 2. He's a few tantalising inches from the hole. What pressure on the young lad. Best close his eyes, I suggest, and think of England. Put it to bed son."
2023 - The Greatest Losing Team
2023 - Beers, Tucks and Shep 'smashed it' and proved themselves fairway duffers by losing the competition by 13 shots. Will and Shep were onto a loser the moment the draw was made and Tucks was named their Captain. Tucks has form in the competition, being on the losing team in almost every event since its inception.
2016 - The (Second) Greatest Losing Team
Here we go again! - Barry, Maurice, Robin and Blade proudly pose in front of the camera lens before their disastrous round in 2016. However, Hutch's team did win the prestigious 'Neatest and Most Legible Scorecard' Competition.
Sinsiter Golf
Tomsy 'Navy Cut' Player cut a sinister look when he became the first competitor to wear a hoodie on the links, in 2015.
Dusk
2021 NGOT Golf day at Lanhydrock. Our last group appear on the 18th fairway in the dusk.
Fairway amble
2000 - Blade and Eadless amble across the fairway.
2021 - Where is the green?
Lanhydrock 2021 - In the gloom on 7th, Tango asks "Where is the green?" when it is in plain sight in front of him. Blade replies "Answer on a postcard to Mr. Tango, Skirt of the Green, At the end of the 7th Fairway, Lanhydrock, Bodmin."
2000 - The First Winning Team
2000 - Eadless, Griff Griff Griffiths (GGG) and Maurice (Stu Moffat) proudly show off
the winners shield (borrowed from the golf club trophy cabinet).
Gavin has a Plus 4 handicap?
Gavin completed a four under par round in 2023 but his efforts were not acknowledged by the competition administrators.
Hard work this!
2023 - 12th. Tucks sits it out whilst another group is allowed to play through. If he smoked it would be a good time for a fag.
Jimbo
2008 - Jimbo. "I do play occasionally Tucks but not at the moment!"
"There goes Beers again - an exhibitionist perhaps? - taking out his sizeable putter and showing it to the camera."
Hoot Toots Greatest Shots - Really?
2000 - Griff Griff Griffith's wicked hook, hitting seaward to reach the green behind him.
2005 - Pente Snr on 15th tee - mid shot.
2017 - Superb flag tending by Jake.
2019 - Tango on the 18th. "I think I can putt this."
2020 - NGOT- Remo creams one off the 1st tee at Lanhydrock, disturbing some resting birds in the tree on the right.
2022 - Tucks on 17, a model of consistency, 3 puts yet again.
2023 - Shep on 2nd - hitting a nice off drive.
2001 - In September the brambles are often loaded with berries. Here Moff and Plums are picking the fruit on 15. Hopefully!
2015 - Blade - "I've hit it somewhere."
2016 - TBW demonstrates a classic swing but is there ding?
2018 - Blade ups the ante with a 86 yard drive down the 5th.
2019 Peter - 'nibbles one in' from the skirt of 3rd.
2020 - Lanhydrock 1st tee. Chef drives the green.
2023 18th. Sheps putts from oblivion.
"Remo on 15 putting for par. It's about 10 feet, slightly left to right down the hill. There it goes heading towards the hole. It's slipped out. Shot dropped."